You Don’t Have to Feel Ready First
Last year, I got invited to speak on a panel.
It was a beautiful opportunity: a gathering for younger women learning about self-leadership and trusting their inner wisdom. I had a dear friend organizing the event, and we’d already talked about it in passing. I knew the invitation was coming.
And still, when did it hit my inbox?
My whole body said no.
It wasn’t fear in the traditional sense. I wasn’t scared of being seen or public speaking. I’ve done both many times.
But I felt that internal shakiness, disqualifying myself immediately.
I didn’t know what I’d say.
I didn’t know when I’d find time to prepare or practice.
I just didn’t feel ready.
So I closed my computer and ignored the email. Told myself I was “thinking about it.” Tried to push it out of my mind (for days.) But I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
The opportunity wouldn’t leave me alone, because deep down, I wanted to say yes.
Eventually, my friend nudged me again: “I need your answer. I have to finalize the agenda.”
And without even thinking, I replied:
“Of course. I’ll do it.”
That simple sentence changed everything.
Not because I had suddenly figured out the perfect talk. Definitely not because I felt certain, totally prepared, or “ready.”
But because I had finally stopped waiting to feel confident first.
What I realized—then and now—is this:
So many of us turn down incredible opportunities not because we don’t want them, but because we haven’t given ourselves permission to feel unready.
We think we need more clarity. More time. A well-thought-out plan. A guarantee that we’ll nail it.
But often, we just need to say “yes” and begin.
Once I said yes to the panel, I did what I always do when I’m unsure where to start: I took a walk down our quiet dirt road in Maine and talked my thoughts out loud into a voice memo.
The trees. The summer breeze moving through the tall grass. The gravel crunching underfoot. All of it helped me drop into my presence.
I didn’t try to script every word; I just let the heart of what I wanted to say imperfectly reveal itself.
After a few more walks and several drafts that were, honestly terrible, I eventually shaped it into a simple, grounded talk.
I delivered it on stage.
I met some brilliant women.
And most importantly, had fun.
And afterward, I felt true confidence.
Not because it went perfectly or because I did my best.
But because I trusted myself to honor what I most wanted, to participate in this great event, even when I didn’t feel ready.
That’s one of the most impactful lessons I’ve learned about the true source of confidence, which I’ll be teaching tomorrow, Wednesday, July 16th, at 2 pm ET in the second session of the Confidence Summer Series.
Confidence is the result of taking consistent, aligned, imperfect action.
For comments:
What would change this week if you gave yourself permission to feel “unready?”
With immense appreciation & gratitude. Always.
