When a Coach Fully Claims Her Authentic Way
And I've been there too. There were many years when I was caught in the loop of shoulds, trying to follow the rules, replicate what worked for someone else, and show up in ways that never felt quite right for me. The results? Disconnected. Scattered. Pretending. (Ouch, that one is hard to admit out loud.) And second-guessing everything.
What If Stuckness Is Just A Waiting Room?
We’ve been taught to panic when things feel slow or when we have to wait.
To interpret stillness as failure or not-enoughness.
We’ve been trained to make it mean we’re not productive enough, not moving as fast as we should, not doing enough.
And I want to gently challenge that.
What If Being a Beginner Is Exactly Where You’re Meant to Be?
We’ve been taught to value certainty. To have the answer. To be the expert.
And especially if you’re a coach or someone who supports others for a living, there can be this unspoken pressure to always be one step ahead.
But here’s the truth I’ve learned again and again: Being a beginner is a gift—if we let it be.
What If There’s Enough for Everyone?
It’s a mindset that says that if someone else has more, I must have less.
And if I have more, someone else will go without.
This way of thinking is very sneaky. It hides underneath comparison, guilt, competition, and scarcity. And whether you’re a coach or not, it affects how you show up in your work, your relationships, and your decisions.
The Coaching Habits That Are Slowing Your Clients Down
Back then, I felt responsible for the success of every session. If my client wasn’t having big insights, I worried I was doing something wrong. If they were quiet, I rushed in with a new question. If they seemed stuck, I felt like it was on me to guide them out of it.
Are You Overworking in Your Coaching Sessions?
Early in my coaching career, I worked with a client who had big dreams of leaving academia. She came to every session full of ideas but rarely took action to move forward. I cared deeply about her vision, so I pushed harder to help her create momentum. I asked more questions, introduced new tools, and even spent time outside our sessions brainstorming how to support her.
What If the Best Thing You Could Do as a Coach Is Less?
When you first start coaching, it's natural to equate effort with impact. You prepare extensively. You ask question after question. You introduce frameworks, suggest exercises, and make sure your client leaves with something tangible. It feels productive. It feels like you're earning your seat.