The Ache of a Wish You Haven’t Let Yourself Have
That’s why these wish list items matter. Not because they’re always life-changing in themselves, but because ignoring them chips away at your integrity, your alignment, your self-trust.
When You’re Taking Responsibility That Isn’t Yours
As I listened, I felt this ache travel from my heart to my belly. Her words landed hard because they were so familiar. I could hear myself in her voice. I could feel all the times I’ve said something nearly identical to myself.
All the times I’ve taken responsibility for something that wasn’t actually mine to take.
And how habituated that pattern can become.
The Quiet Labor Of Invisible Work
I describe this season as being in the basement of a house, digging and building the foundation one cement brick at a time. You wouldn’t necessarily know it because there’s no house standing on top of it yet that I can invite you over to see. But I’m down there, digging and laying the bricks.
Thinking vs. Doing: Why Your Busy Brain Isn’t Always Progressing
And when your brain is working really hard at thinking, it can trick you into believing you’re moving forward, when in reality, nothing is happening outside your head.
No decision has been made. No action has been taken. There’s nothing you could point to as proof.
Thinking feels busy. Doing creates evidence.
The Quiet Restlessness You Can’t Ignore
Have you accomplished things you once dreamed about and found that the satisfaction was shorter-lived than you expected? Do you find yourself looking at other women who seem lit up by their lives and wondering what they know that you don't? Is there a creative dream, a contribution, or a way of being that you've been carrying for years but never given yourself permission to pursue? Do you feel like you have more to give than your current life is asking of you? When someone asks "how are you," do you say "good" or "busy" and mean it as a way to close the conversation rather than open it?
Collecting Evidence of What’s Working
The problem arises when we only believe biased stories, assuming that the bad is the whole truth.
That’s why one of the most valuable practices we can create, especially as parents, partners, coaches, and leaders, is to collect evidence of everything that is working intentionally.
Integrity. Humility. Love. How I Use These Core Values in Life, Leadership, and Coaching
I share them here because I believe that knowing your values, truly knowing them, not just being able to name them, is one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself. And because the way I define these three words might surprise you.
It All Started with a Juicy Peach
Everything in my life at that time was about meeting expectations. What my career needed from me. What my failing marriage required of me. What mothering an eleven-year-old demanded of me. I had grown so used to making decisions and choices through the lens of other people's needs, systems, and structures that I didn't even recognize the lens anymore. I thought it was me.
When You Can’t Stop Thinking About Your Clients
A thought. Followed by an image. Then, an insight about what we had just unearthed together. Something I hadn’t seen earlier when I was sitting in “coach” mode, but was now fully landing in the quiet of my kitchen, with pesto shrimp simmering and Noah Kahan playing in the background.
The Emotion I’m Relying On Most Right Now
Because this particular chapter of my life isn’t just asking me to do more. It’s asking me to be more. Someone new.
Someone bigger. Braver. More visible.
More honest.
More whole.
You Don’t Have to Feel Ready First
So many of us turn down incredible opportunities not because we don’t want them, but because we haven’t given ourselves permission to feel unready.
When I Stopped Making Myself Wrong
Every time I completed something meaningful, whether supporting loved ones through a difficult time, hosting an event, or launching a new idea at work, I braced for what always came next: regret.
Not because things had gone terribly wrong. But because I only looked for what had.
When a Coach Fully Claims Her Authentic Way
And I've been there too. There were many years when I was caught in the loop of shoulds, trying to follow the rules, replicate what worked for someone else, and show up in ways that never felt quite right for me. The results? Disconnected. Scattered. Pretending. (Ouch, that one is hard to admit out loud.) And second-guessing everything.
What If Stuckness Is Just A Waiting Room?
We’ve been taught to panic when things feel slow or when we have to wait.
To interpret stillness as failure or not-enoughness.
We’ve been trained to make it mean we’re not productive enough, not moving as fast as we should, not doing enough.
And I want to gently challenge that.
The Number of Times I Want to Quit My Business (In a Day)
Building a business, finding my voice, writing in a way that connects, figuring out what to say, keeping up with marketing trends, algorithms, and whatever Substack is doing this week... it’s exhausting. And some days I just want to lie down and read a book. (Okay, most days.)
When the Past Feels Like Proof
Hindsight bias is when the past feels like proof of what’s coming.
It convinces you that what happened before is exactly how it will go again.
And it makes the fact that things didn’t work out last time feel like a personal failure you should have definitely seen coming.
What If Coaching Isn’t Just for Coaches?
I think we sometimes assume that coaching is only for people who want to build a business or work with paying clients. But the truth is, coaching is a way of seeing and supporting people. It's a skill set that helps you show up with more curiosity and less controlling energy. A perspective that invites reflection instead of rushing to a solution. And it's a practice that builds trust, not just in others, but in yourself.
How Coaching Changed the Way I Lead (And Why It Will Change Yours Too)
When someone delays turning in part of a team project, it's easy to label them as disorganized, distracted, or just not committed. But if you pause long enough to consider what's underneath the surface, you might notice something entirely different. Maybe they're nervous about how their work will be received. Maybe they're unsure how to ask for help. Maybe they're mentally exhausted from something happening at home that has nothing to do with work.
What If Being a Beginner Is Exactly Where You’re Meant to Be?
We’ve been taught to value certainty. To have the answer. To be the expert.
And especially if you’re a coach or someone who supports others for a living, there can be this unspoken pressure to always be one step ahead.
But here’s the truth I’ve learned again and again: Being a beginner is a gift—if we let it be.
What If There’s Enough for Everyone?
It’s a mindset that says that if someone else has more, I must have less.
And if I have more, someone else will go without.
This way of thinking is very sneaky. It hides underneath comparison, guilt, competition, and scarcity. And whether you’re a coach or not, it affects how you show up in your work, your relationships, and your decisions.